Great things that have yet to be invented:

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1. Nanobot clothing that conforms to your body in a flattering way. So that those of us with rippling six packs can have our glutes and abs shine steel like through tight black leather, while the rest of the blubbering masses will be safely shielded in just a slight thin layer of vertically striped cloth.

2. Cell phones that connect all devices. You’re listening to a CD in your car, halfway through that killer guitar riff on track 6 and you’ve got to stop for smokes and a Nutrigrain bar at the closest KwikiCorner. No need to panic, thanks to WiFi and your cell phone’s speakers, you just click a button and now you’re blasting tunes like never before and all of the ladies love you.

3. Semi-circle rear view mirrors. Instead of having rear view mirrors that are flat planes and show you what’s out your back window, have them curved so that all of your blind spots are covered as well. This one would make me millions if I’d sit down and get the patent.

4. Living pictures. Not like those weak simulations of waterfalls that you see at malls, but full on views of some remote location. Only a short amount of video would actually be needed, maybe a week’s worth, with the trees swaying slightly and in different prepensities, and various little animals could come out at certain times, the sun would rise, zenith and set, rain and snow and the occasional wayward wanderer would appear. This would be a wonderful way to experience the desert while living in Alaska.

If you’d like to create any of these things, you can either do so on your own and totally screw me, or maybe do it and send me one – that should make us even, though I wouldn’t pass up a $100million check if it came my way.

The Peanut Gallery

  1. hmmmm…interesting to think about. i think we are on the way to some of them – particularly the nanobot clothing, although developments in that area are probably more for safety and stuff at this time. hmmmm….a concave rearview mirror….i’m not sure this one is physically possible? depending on how far away from the mirror you are and stuff like that? i took physics too long ago to be able to think about this well enough. the living pictures – first i thought about webcams, but the internet isn’t good for streaming video (dropped packets). the storage for a week’s worth of video would probably be way more than anyone could afford. and to stream video like that, you’d need leased lines at least. hmmm…still, interesting to think about….


  2. a week’s worth of video, 800×600, comes out to be about 3.5TB, which is alot, but you wouldn’t need every single frame really, because you could reuse some things, like stillness is only one frame, and can probably take up over 80% of the main image. At that point we’re down to 710GB, which really isn’t that much, as I can store 200GB on my 6 month old computer. Add in another 800 or so Gigs for the little guys who come walking in and whatnot and you’ve got yourself a nice little setup. Plus, you could get Blu-Ray discs or whatever comes out next and add in a whole new year worth of foreground effects, as those things can already hold like 24 hours worth of video, and each new effect would only be like 60seconds on average.


  3. but I do appreciate your comments…


  4. Is this better? I ended up there by accident. No, I did not read your entire blog but over the course of many months-who knows. Sorry my explaination is not more exciting. Sometimes I think one word can do the job.


  5. first, i was imagining a convex mirror, like at supermarkets. look up to your convex rearview and you’d see out the back, the sides the back seats and even part of yourself. it’d be like turning your head round. but it could be a little distracting.

    and, am i correct in imagining this is what you meant by the live video: put up a little camera up some African tree and just let it capture whatever happens. like a security camera, but framed beautifully in an art gallery, and in HD color no diggity!. so the wanderers and animals would be real right? because you kind of made them sound created.

    julie, though constructive, your criticisms were based on these inventions working in the foreseeable future. his title was ‘great things that have yet to be invented:’ not ‘why haven’t these been invented yet’

    i don’t have a cell phone so i really didn’t pay attention to that one. nanobot clothing is like wearing a wig and there would be no motivation to get into shape. would there be lots more flirting but much less sex?

    chad was marco:

  6. to continue as strings are tend toward:

    convex mirror issue=yes, but not the whole circle, just a thin strip like mirrors are now, but with the curve. good jerb c-marco.

    the camera would be made up, a streaming camera would be cool, but you’d never see a gnomish trader peaking out from behind a rock at 3:30am if you actually used a real camera. I’m thinking the thrill of it would be to see these really strange things but you’d have to be looking at such inopportune times.

    more flirting and yes sex probably. or at least, more surprises right before sex.


  7. I can’t believe you stole my idea about the pictures! really I thought of it first everyone so if you do create such a wonderful invention, I am entitled to 99.9% of the profit ( I’ll let the others and Na collect whatever is left over from manufacturers, agents and squirrels.)


  8. so is this a website that will give me some good inventions to invent…. or are you just wasting my time…

    Bianca Porter:

  9. Not sure Bianca, did you take the time to read the post? Or are you just wasting mine?


  10. I’m quite curious about the rear view mirror bit, Can you explain a bit more about how it will work?


  11. Read through the comments, Anna, plenty of info there. You’ll want an elephant, two banjos and enough string to amuse a whole litter of kittens, and you should be good to go on inventing your first of my inventions!


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