Why Cyclists Have to be Assholes

written 29 Aug 2008 in the early afternoon

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Motorists often feel and state that there isn’t room for bicycles on the street. Some beep and scream and go as far as to try and run people off the road. These people are fools, ignorant to the law, and a disgrace to humanity. Truly, unamerican, at the least, violent criminals at worst.

Today, while riding my bike to deposit a check in Ebensburg, Pennsylvania, not traveling more than 3 miles total, I was cut off twice and denied my right of way twice. Understandable, as I’ve come to expect small mindedness, rudeness and sheer stupidity from small town and suburban Pennsylvania. After all, these are the same people who raise their children as racists, though they have never lived near anyone who wasn’t white. The same people who don’t even bother with listening to Presidential debates because Barack Obama’s name rhymes with something.

What did surprise me was when a woman dressed in a tan police officer’s uniform honks like crazy at me and then swirves toward me, forcing me into oncoming traffic, which thankfully was going very slowly due to a red light.

So it’s no wonder cyclists swirve in and out of traffic and ignore street laws, because they’re not afforded the same respect motorists give eachother.

Filed Under: ride bikes
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3 people chatting it up...

  • unknown user pic

    Here in Toronto, cyclists are indeed the assholes. They refuse to ride in provided bike lanes, since they’re too cool to use them. Noooo, they have to ride almost in the middle of already-congested road lanes. I have only seen kids using the bike lanes provided in the downtown. They also have a complete lack of disregard for pedestrians, I have seen careless cyclists nearly hit people several times. One once ran into some Chinese guy’s fruit stand (he bicycle should not be on the sidewalk anyways), then just got up and carried on, while leaving the old Chinese guy to pick up his spilled merchandise.

    But the cherry on top had to be about two weeks ago, when a cyclist and his wife (or girlfriend, not sure) were riding in the streetcar right-of-way. Cars and pedestrians know they are not allowed here, but of course the damn cyclists think they are. No matter the streetcars clanked their bells at these asshats, they still didn’t move, holding up streetcars with about 180 people each in the morning rush hour. Are they just trying to make trouble? Aren’t cyclists supposed to stay clear of streetcar tracks?

    Maybe people in your area don’t like you because they’re a bunch of redneck hicks, but in most urban centers, it seems to be the cyclists at fault.

    - Adam | 05:25pm 29 Sep 08

  • I certainly agree with you, Adam, that cyclists often take liberties that would never fly with motorists. My entire point was based around this, as it was to provide the reasoning: motorists (and the lawmakers/enforcers) have for too long assumed that roads were made just for them, and so people on bikes have no resolve other than to do what they can to get around in the streets.

    Now, basing the behavior of all cyclists on those of kids on bikes is unfair, obviously. 16 year olds driving cars around like assholes, peeling tire and going 65 through their neighborhoods are not representative of all people driving cars. Kids, teenagers in particular, are usually jerks. That’s why they’re teenagers, right?

    Where I was at when writing this article is not where I live, though yes, there were plenty of rednecks in the area. I realize that Toronto doesn’t have the same hot summers, so perhaps your citizens necks are not quite as red, but an asshole is eventually going to be full of shit, no matter how civilized there peoples may be.

    So yes, holding up streetcars, knocking over the Chinese, bad things, bad cyclists. Destroying all of the streetcars and elderly Chinese in the world isn’t going to eliminate the horrible affects on our planet and your waistline that motorists inflict on this planet. :(

    - nathan | 02:38pm 30 Sep 08
  • unknown user pic

    Being a cyclist in towns isn’t always a huge deal. But as a person that lives in teh country it’s the road bikers that are often views as the assholes.

    But it’s not really unjustified…those guys train for countless hours and put their body through hell so of course they are going to have pride in what they do. People that drive cars don’t really have alot of pride in their “driving” as much as they are just in a rush to get where they are going.

    - Jamis | 10:19am 6 Oct 08

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