Project: Giant Hamster Liberation

In a house not far from my own, a stone’s throw you might say and mean it literally, there is a pair of cages. The cages are roughly 1′ x 1′ x 2′ and in each one there sits a giant hamster. I’ve been told they are gunea pigs but still, they look like very large hamsters. Both of them are white, albino perhaps, but their eyes are not pink, they are a fierce bloodshot red. Between pupil and eyeball there is very little difference, all mottled over by the swirling amalgamation of longing for escape and anger at captivity and a little bit of giving up on hope. The two hamsters look nearly identical, save for the predominant intention in each one’s gaze.

Both of them sit, seperated from each other by the cage’s fencing but butted up to eachother so that they might sneak the smallest bit of their noses through to touch eachother if they were so inclined. They are both named for the empty soda 12-packs in their respective cages. DNL has clearly succumbed to his role in captivity, the life has been sucked from his soul and he’s simply waiting for the next feeding, not enough room in the cage to take two steps let alone get any real exercise.

Barqs still has bite, though. He stands on his hind legs and thrusts his head into the top of his confinement, whether in an attempt to shatter through the aluminum wires or just to get a peak at me looking down on him, a stranger, wondering what I’ll do. Most people prod at him or in the kindest of moments, throw feed in for him to consume. Calories building up with nowhere to release them.

I have decided that I will free these creatures. They’ve been tamed, so they very well could die. It is the middle of winter and I’m uncertain as to these trapped fledgling creatures ability to burrow or willingness to draw together for warmth. I will probably wait for spring, but I fear Barqs might lose his edge by then, his will eventually shattered at the loss of hope. DNL will never survive if Barqs isn’t strong for him.

Also, there is the threat of natural predators. The surrounding area is suburban Erie, so I’m guessing the primary threats would be curious neighborhood dogs and cats. These hamsters are larger than most cats, but I couldn’t see them fending off an all too playful kitten’s claws.

On the plus side, there are plenty of gardens, low security types, the sort of places a rabbit would easily be able to get into, loot for half of its bounty, and make a clean escape before the warden every noticed.

In fact, quite a few rabbits roam through my own yard and into the neighbor’s garden doing just this. That’s a good sign. Rabbits can survive, hamsters should be able to as well. And these hamsters have the advantage of knowing to fear humans. Cages will do that to a beast.

Regardless of whether or not they will survive, it is obvious to me that I will make a choice for them, die free or do so over a longer period in your captivity.

I suppose if they really want to, they can always go back scratching on their master’s doors.

Purportedly, there is more information about this here.

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