Differences, Expletives and the Proper way to utilize the Letter Z

So after having soaked up the weekend and now living in the week here in England, Great Old Motherland of the States, I’ve been splurging on the small differences, the millions of them that there are. Every moment of every turn around every corner that makes up each and all the single days is packed full of them.

The actual truth is that there are a plethora of things that are similar about this place. We took a train from the airport home and looking out the window I saw the same old busted down industrial zones with graffiti tagged across their faces. There are old familiarities like McDonald’s and Pizza Hut and even Subway, which you might expect, and some less likely candidates, like Rolling Rock and the Yellow Pages. I’ve been sampling the local beers, Boddingtons among others, and they’re good – tall pints for 2 pounds each and a pack of my trusty Camels at my side, adorned with giant labels that read “Smoking is Harmful to You and Others Around You” or my favorite, straight to the point “Smoking Kills” and the Camels, instead of being called Lights, are called Camel Subtle Flavor Blue. I like that. No dicking around as to whether or not they’re more or less bad for you, just subtler in flavor and implying that you might smoke them under a sunny summer sky…

But the differences are really what’s been floating my boat as of late. I now live at Cambridge Road, not on it. My money comes in notes, not bills. Oh and there’s no tipping at bars. I gave the guy my tip, a pound on two, pretty decent one might say, to which he quickly stated “Nawh mate, no tippin’ ‘ere, ‘is’s England. Cheers.” I like the word, “cheers.” Regardless, at first it was cool – no tipping equals more drinks at the end of the night – and the service is impeccable. I’ve known it to take as much as fifteen minutes getting a drink at the local bar back home, but here they see you, acknowledge that they’ve seen you, and get around to you quite quickly. It’s nice. Still, there’s something about the connection between a drunkard and his dealer barman that I like about tipping. Sure it costs money, but its a little silent nod of the head to indicate whether or not you were pleased with the encounter. The interaction between bartender and barfly is one of the biggest reasons for attending said establishments.

Thanks for your comments, calls and concern, and until next time, click here (link disabled).

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