My Good and Loving Dear Aunt Nathan

June 2, 2008 11:53am

Note to fans: this is a brand new installment in the series!

Everyday I find myself making my own surveys, like how do I rate bleu cheese on a scale from 1 to 10. Or How happy does rain drops falling on my head really make me?

Satisfied, Never Satisfied, Very Good, Good, Neutral?

Each and everyday I create a survey…what do you suggest?

AND

if life was a survey would take it?

Etta Woy-Woy
Anywhere I can survey

I know what you mean, E Double-W, surveys can be extremely enticing. For example, what is my favorite brand of detergent? I had no idea until given a multiple choice of Clorox, Tide, or Other. The options were just too overwhelming but when presented with a simple set of radio buttons or little circles to fill in, I found myself clearly choosing Other. Now when I go to the store, my husband’s shirt smells clean!

On the other hand, though, and I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you this, but surveys are evil and were invented by the devil’s brother, Lou, in 1876 as a way to keep the native Indian population of upper Germany in check. Every survey taken still kills over five baby penguins, and the cute ones, not those ugly ones that have frilly hair and look like they’re still covered in some type of egg goo.

Thanks for your time and mine!

Up Next: And Finally, a Double Whammy of Ol' Thyme Proportions